Last week I shared how anxiety impacts our minds and bodies. If there is any ounce of doubt, anxiety can worm in with questions about self-worth and whether we deserve love at all. In the end, anxiety can become very destructive.

As I was diving into the topic of self-love, I came across this quote “Love is inherently risky, especially self-love, but the alternative is worse.” I think the alternative is definitely worse, as I have felt it.

There are ways to protect ourselves from anxiety. One of the keys to reduce anxiety is self-love, as it shifts your brain away from panic and self-criticism.

Self-love means treating yourself with the same kindness you give to others, wrote Mind-Body Care, adding, self-love is not only about feeling good.  It is also about making strong choices that help you heal and grow.

Other experts have also written about self-love with concurring thoughts:

Psychology Today’s Dr. Nicole Tetreault wrote, “self-love is more than just a feel-good concept—it’s a scientifically-backed pillar of mental well-being.” She added, at its core, the practice of self-love is treating yourself with kindness, compassion, and respect. These three things make up the foundation upon resilience, confidence and fulfillment are built.

Self-love plays a vital role in maintaining strong mental health, emotional resilience, and overall well-being according to Oaks Integrated Care, a nonprofit organization focused on improved quality of life of those impacted with a mental illness or developmental disability.

“Loving yourself requires daily attention to ‘untangle old wiring’ of self-criticism, unworthiness and self loathing, and develop new neural pathways” wrote Jacinta Tynan, adding, it takes work and commitment.

According to Mind-Body Care, the brain changes when you practice self-love. Powerful brain scans from recent years show that when you use caring habits, certain areas light up. The prefrontal cortex, which helps you make choices and feel calm, becomes stronger.  The amygdala, which is linked to fear and anger, becomes less active.

Tetreault commented she has also seen supportive science data of self-love. Self-love strengthens the prefrontal cortex which helps with self-awareness, decision-making, and emotional balance.

Neuroscientists have discovered our brains are like soft clay. They can change, and is referred to as neuroplasticity. Simple acts like talking kindly to yourself, taking deep breaths, can build strong pathways in your mind.

Experts outline the numerous benefits of self-love:

• Lower stress-lower activity in the part of the brain linked to stress and panic.
• Faster recovery from bad moods.
• More gray matter in the prefrontal cortex that help you plan and stay calm
• Increase resilience.
• Willingness to take risks. We build faith in ourselves.
• Compassion:  we accept our strengths and weaknesses with compassion, extend understanding to others.
• Self-efficacy:  we believe in our ability to succeed
• Stronger relationships
• Increased motivation
• Learn to set boundaries, includes saying “no” when necessary.

In what ways can you practice self-love…

• Let go of your judging mind and break free from comparing yourself to others.
• Invite self-acceptance. Be kind to yourself.
• Celebrate the uniqueness of you.
• Find activities that make you light up, that bring joy.
• Feel your emotions, name your emotions, and move on.
• Allow for compassion. Be gentle with yourself. Wrap yourself in love like you would for your best friend.
• Take in the good. Reflect on positive feedback.
• Process Your Fears to better understand them.
• Trust your inner voice.

According to licensed clinical psychologist and assistant professor Taylor Crouch, there is a large body of psychological research that shows self-compassion and self-love have a strong impact on our mental health and our emotional state, both in terms of decreasing anxiety, depression, anger and loneliness, and also increasing support and encouragement for ourselves.

“How you love yourself is how you teach others to love you.” — Rupi Kaur

Remember, self-love is a practice, not a destination.

Resources:

Image by rawpixel.com on Magnific retrieved on 6/15/2026 from https://www.magnific.com/free-vector/love-yourself-instagram-story-template-self-love-concept-with-woman-illustration-vector_20346414.htm

HelpGuide.org “I Feel Anxious.: 10 Tips for Dealing with Anxiety.” Last updated 2/12/2026. Retrieved on 6/14/2026 from https://www.helpguide.org/mental-health/anxiety/tips-for-dealing-with-anxiety

Mamaya Health. ”Self-Love: How Small Daily Habits Can Protect Your Mental Health.” 4/15/2025. Retrieved on 6/14/2026 from https://mamayahealth.com/self-love-and-mental-health/

Mind-Body Care. “The Psychology of Self-Love: How Neuroscience Supports Mental Wellness.”

Oaks Integrated Care. “The Importance of Self-Love for Mental Health.” 2/11/2025. Retrieved on 6/14/2026 from https://oaksintcare.org/the-importance-of-self-love-for-mental-health/

Stewart, Alison Rachel. “13 Steps to Achieving Total Self-Love.” 5/9/2025. Retrieved on 6/14/2026 from https://www.healthline.com/health/13-self-love-habits-every-woman-needs-to-have

Tetreault, Ph.D., Nicole A. “The Practice of Self-Love: A Gift to Your Mind and Soul>” 2/26/2025. Retrieved on 6/14/2026 from https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/wire-your-mind-for-love/202502/the-practice-of-self-love-a-gift-to-your-mind-and-soul

Tynan, Jacinta. “How to make self-love an instinctual habit,” 6/10/2018. The Sunda y Morning Herald. Retrieved on 6/14/2026 from https://www.smh.com.au/lifestyle/health-and-wellness/how-to-make-self-love-an-instinctual-habit-20180607-p4zk0c.html

Weinstein, Dina. “Loving Yourself and Others: The Impact of Compassion on Mental Health and Wellness.” 2/7/2023. Retrieved on 6/14/2026 from https://www.vcuhealth.org/news/loving-yourself-and-others-the-impact-of-compassion-on-mental-health-and-wellness/